Push through or take a break?

[Iggy]

Need a bit of advice please ladies and gents.

Can't hit a barn door at the moment and feels like I've been in a downward spiral since I started up again a couple of months ago. 

Bit of background - bought a new gun last August, shot it well out of the box and this more or less carried on until the end of November when the weather started to turn lousy and I decided to ease back over the winter. Only shot one or twice over winter and started up again at the end of Feb, hoping to just pick up where I'd left off. 

Also, things at home are not great at the moment....a close family member is terminally ill (and very frail) and for the last 12 months or so we've been caring for them at home which is becoming increasingly upsetting not to mention challenging and exhausting for everyone involved. 

My one respite is Sunday morning which I still look forward to as much as I always have, but getting back from shooting today I just don't know what I should do at the moment. I walk onto a stand with zero confidence, pre planned hold points, kill points and focus have completely evaporated and it feels like I'm a total beginner again.

At the end of the day it's only shooting and of little significance compared to what's going on around us, I'd just value an opinion on wether I should stick at it or lay off completely until matters at home improve and start over then? My worry is that if I carry  on as things are I'll just enjoy it less and less and end up jacking it in altogether.

Thanks all.

 

[ips]

I am sorry to here of your family members illness it must be very upsetting and difficult.

I have had these dips in performance on a few occasions and at the moment not a dip in performance but a dip in interest as far as comp is concerned. My advice is shoot a different discipline that way you get to shoot but without the pressure or expectations of shooting well. Trust me this is the best way forward. Then when your ready you will go back to your preferred discipline with gusto.

regards

ian

 

[Nimbusgb]

Sorry to hear of your 'challenges', we've gone through this 4 times in 2 years. Father, Sister, Father-in-Law and a good friend I met while shooting. Sodding cancer.

Take the pressure off yourself. I assume shooting is not a source of income, it's something you do for yourself. You already know that your mental state is not conducive to straighting the day so make the most of the other side of things. Most days out on the grounds you can see acquaintances you've bumped into before, chat to strangers who have no idea of your background and don't have any preconceptions. Enjoy being out and about and just enjoy the respite. It's not always sunny but it's something that gives you pleasure when it goes right. It needn't become a problem if it doesn't. After all in the grand scheme of things a few clays make not one iota of difference.

 

[Doctor Lecter]

I understand your situation ,  last year lost my mother and brother within 6 days  , ease off the shooting  try to put this awful time in some sort of perspective  if you can ,  life is and can be cruel .. 

 

[Mark Downer]

Keep going along. Enjoy it without putting too much pressure on yourself by trying to hit big scores.    

 

[Hamster]

I am so sorry for you and your family, nothing but nothing can help ease the pain of what you're all going through, unfortunately like others I have been through the sheer hell these events bring and the heart ache seems never ending and impossible to come to terms with - at first. I've had my life blessed with friends who are no longer here and a mother in law whom I adored was taken by cancer not very long ago, I feared for my wife's sanity as she watched her wither away as did she herself losing weight to such an extent it scared me. 

In the end what saves you are your friends who gather round for support - and time will slowly heal and slowly you will all adjust. If I were to offer any advice it would be to accept how immaterial scores actually are, even winning a shoot outright is a pretty pointless event in the grand scheme of things. Enjoy the round, talk to friends you know and make new ones, think back to the earlier times you first started and what it was you had to do to improve, go back to basics and just shoot for the hell of it and forget the scores for a while. Your living has never and will never depend on it. When things slowly improve at home hopefully your shooting application will too without you making a conscious effort, when your inner self returns to something of a normality then you can do the things that bring improved results, tried and tested things like following people who shoot better than yourself (accompanying them if possible), getting your timing, address and tempo right etc, nothing helps as much as confidence and that comes from taking small positive steps. You don't have to straight a stand to know you've shot well enough so accept that misses are part and parcel of the day.

 

[donna]

along with the others, I feel for you and what you are going though.  Personally, with the shooting try not to beat yourself up over it.  No matter what bad things are going on in our lives, when we go to do our hobbies whatever they may be we think we can put them to the back of our mind and carry on as normal but we can't.  It's still there and it's hard to concentrate.  I think maybe going to the shoots with friends and walking around might help even if it's just to get out of the environment for a few hours.  Meet others, have a coffee/bacon butty (always cheers me up) and just try to relax for a while then maybe when you feel the time is right for you, start off with a bit of skeet which will get you back into the swing of things and once you've got your confidence up a bit, go back to your normal shoots but don't get too upset or disappointed if you don't start winning at the first attempt! 

i think the main thing is to talk.  Talk to friends, come onto the forum and just vent your feelings.  In my job I hear this all the time, talking helps as long as you have someone willing to listen and I think we are all a great bunch of people who try to help each other.  

Take care and my best wishes and thoughts go to you and your family

 

[ips]

fabulous support above for a fellow forumite. Touching really .....

 

[bisondan]

I had this last year with my Dad, he was in and out of hospital from the middle of May until the end of August then he went in one last time at the start of September and never came out.

I know what you are going through, caring for someone loved is unconditional.  With me it was up for work at 6 in the morning, doing a days work, home for dinner, then straight up the hospital, then it starts over - this happens every day of the week.

On Sunday's I still managed to get out shooting and although it was on the back of my mind it was really nice to get out and I'm fortunate enough to shoot with some great people, also my Dad always took a real interest in my shooting so it was nice to be able to go to the hospital with Mum and sister on Sunday's and I'd tell him where I'd been and how I'd got on.

 

[Iggy]

Thank you all so much for your kind and thoughtful words, I'm really very touched indeed. 
 
I think we've been so wrapped up in this for so long we can't 'see the wood for the trees' and it's all too easy to forget that many other people have been through the same. Hammy's comments in particular resonate...it's my father in law who's poorly and seeing the impact it's had on my wife and mother in law is awful. 
 
I've always had a good relationship with my in laws, especially my father in law and seeing him stripped all dignity by Parkinson's/dementia and cancer and his gradual irreversible decline is really hard. 
 
I really don't mean to complain and I wasn't....I think I just needed to vocalise...and as you've said, in the great scheme of things a score card doesn't really count for much under the circumstances.
 
I think the thing to do is just get out when I can and enjoy the time out, regardless of the outcome....and try to pick things back up another time. 
 
Thanks again all, your generous and genuine support is much appreciated....it's very heartwarming to see what a caring little community we've created.  

 

[luked]

Iggy, first off, sorry to hear about your current situation, my heart and best wishes go out to you and your family.

have you thought about trying another type of shooting altogether? I have always been a scatter gunner but found that small bore rifle shooting was great at times of stress as the entire aim is to relax and lower your heart rate and lear your mind just focusing on a small black dot 50m away.

I know a guy that is a therapist and whilst chatting to him at a party about what i like about small bore he thanked me as he is always looking for ways to get his clients to relax, obviously meditation is one of them, but telling an australian male to meditate is like telling them to put on a dress, but he reckoned precision rifle shooting was a great way to get them to effectively meditate by stealth.

 

[ExSCA]

I was away from my PC for most of the weekend - and so didn't see this until this morning. 

Firstly - Iggy, my thoughts are with you and your family - hope everything gets better soon. 

Secondly - thanks everyone for being such a supportive crew, lovely to see. When sometimes our little group snaps to arguments, it's heartwarming to see how caring we can be. 

Good work ShootClay. 

 

[Tron]

I'm sorry to read about you're situation Iggy.  Thoughts and prayers to your family.  Sometimes, it's best to just walk away for a while and clear your head.  Shooting can be a great outlet, but demands complete focus and can't afford such preoccupations.  I guess it depends on what you get from a shooting outing being that some people are highly competitive and must have a winning score to feel fulfilled, while others just enjoy being out with their buds and enjoying the comradery.

Chin up and take it easy.

Jb

 

[Wonko the Sane]

Done the same thing many yrs ago.  At the time I decided that taking care of the family was way more important than any hobby.  I have never regretted that. I did stop in at the club I belonged to at the time just to BS with some folks and the minor social activity was a breather of sorts. 

The decision you make will remain with you far longer than you may realize now but it sounds as tho you are taking a reasonable path.  You certainly seem a good person, Iggy and I hope all works well for you and yours.

take care

Charlie

 

[maddmatt]

Personally I would take a break, shooting will always be there and in these types of circumstances should take a back seat. Charlie is spot on, hope it all goes well.

 

[GavB]

Having gone/going through a very similar situation to previous posts I would take each shoot day as it comes.If you feel like it on the day then go for it, with the realisation that understandably you may not be in the best frame of mind to shoot your best. If things start going awry score wise, try not to be too hard on yourself. Admittedly that's hard to do if you're the competitive type,  Enjoy the day and the company of good friends. If you put in a good performance,  well thats just an added bonus.

 

[Les53]

Having gone/going through a very similar situation to previous posts I would take each shoot day as it comes.If you feel like it on the day then go for it, with the realisation that understandably you may not be in the best frame of mind to shoot your best. If things start going awry score wise, try not to be too hard on yourself. Admittedly that's hard to do if you're the competitive type,  Enjoy the day and the company of good friends. If you put in a good performance,  well thats just an added bonus.

What Gav said! I too was in a similar position last year......twice in fact!!!! You will come through it, even though at times you may feel as though you never will. 

 

[Maxum]

Ian you know how to contact me if you are in need of help with your shooting. see you soon. chin up mate.

 

[Iggy]

Ian you know how to contact me if you are in need of help with your shooting. see you soon. chin up mate.

Cheers Darren, appreciate that. I'll be in touch when the heads feeling a bit straighter don't worry.